Well, I've done it. My eyeballs are like those rubber fried eggs you sometimes catch off of floats and my fingers are worn to the bone -- seriously, I'm typing with little bloody bone nubs here -- but I answered every one of those questions. I nearky killed myself, but I think we also created a really cool interview; I even learned some things I didn't know about myself and my work. I'll have to archive it somewhere.

If you want to read it, the whole vast thing is here. Please don't add any more questions to the thread, though. It's fine to ask questions, but start a new topic for them and let me get to them in my own sweet time. I'm exhausted and don't want to keep going through that gargantuan thread over and over again.

Thanks to everyone who participated. It was fun in a thumbscrew-and-molten-lead kind of way.

By the way, here's a heartfelt plea from my friend Bobby, who has a car but needs someone to share gas costs from the Athens/Atlanta area to New Orleans and back sometime around the end of this week. He's funny and entertaining and not a serial killer, I promise. He has a place to stay and may even be able to find you one (though not with me, sorry).

Looking for someone to share gas expenses from Athens/Atlanta Ga. area to NOLA to celebrate the Mardi Gras....departing on Fri. or Sat. 2/24 or 25 and returning on Wed. 3/1.Good music, light snacks, and sex stories provided for the road. Totally chill twinks, bears, and hags a + ....no smugglers or drunks in the car....will stop for smoke breaks if needed. Contact: Bobby at athensinsideout (at) bellsouth (dot) net

And now I am going back to bed with Omaha the Cat Dancer. Too bad I'm not into pussy, huh?

GROOOOAAAAAAN. I created a monster. I also created a really cool interview, or rather you folks did -- from now on, I only want to be interviewed by my readers, not by journalists who only pretend to have read my shit -- but my fingers are falling off and my back is breaking. If anyone in town has Vicodin or similar, please send now. (Seriously. I spent ten straight hours sitting here answering those questions, not realizing how long I'd been at it, and I am in pain. E-mail funkyegret (at) yahoo (dot) com. I will give you a book and a kiss.)

AND STOP POSTING QUESTIONS. I can't take it anymore. If you post one before midnight (CST), I'll endeavor to answer it later, but I just can't do any more right now.

You can read the whole honking thing here.