Photo by Karen Gadbois, Squandered Heritage
Our resulting interview will appear in an unspecified future issue of Italian Vogue.
PZB: So despite the claims of
PBXVI: Yes, I enjoy the Dead Kennedys. There's always room for Jello!
PZB: It would be hypocritical of me to hold a man's youthful indiscretions against him. Anyway, I don't really think you're an actual Nazi.
PBXVI: Thank you. I don't really think you queers are destroying the rain forests. Well, I do, but you're making up for your part of it with your lovely garden.
PZB: Er ... thank you. Um, about calling you an asshole ...
PBXVI: I am kind of an asshole. I'm not one of these peace-and-love hippie Popes like John Paul II. If we could still burn people at the stake, you'd be one crispy critter by now. But given that we cannot ... was that a Prada bag I noticed in your perp walk?
PZB: Yes! Prada is one of the few designers I bother with anymore. I love your red loafers. I bought a black Prada shoulder bag in 1996 and carried it for more than ten years. Eventually it was in such disgraceful shape that I had to replace it, but I soon grew to hate the Vera Bradley bag I bought. It was nice and roomy and had lots of handy pockets, but it was so ugly.
PBXVI: Vera Bradley ... the quilted paisley ones? Oh, dear.
PZB: Well, mine was black, but it was quilted, all right. I don't know what came over me. Chris said it looked "grammaw-ish." Anyway, I found the bag in the picture for under $200 online, and while I don't love it as much as my old one, it's a very nice bag.
PBXVI: It's certainly the ... how shall I put it ... highlight of your outfit.
PZB: Zing! Yes, I had on my camouflage pants for going into battle -- I got them at Target, I think, the fly is always coming unzipped -- and my St. Joseph medal, and a Saints T-shirt -- you know, man of the people, regular New Orleans folks. Unfortunately, it's a kid's shirt and it's a little tight in the chest. As you can see in the picture, it rucked up at the bosom when my hands were cuffed behind my back.
PBXVI: Oh, my God!
PZB: What, you didn't know we were handcuffed?
PBXVI: No, you said "bosom."
PZB: Sorry.
PBXVI: And your shoes ... ? I caught a glimpse of them on wwltv.com. They didn't look nearly as nice as my red loafers.
PZB: No, they were just an old pair of pink Nike Shox I bought in Chicago on our summer vacation, the pre-K one in 2005 when we ate all the molecular gastronomy, because my old K-Martens were hurting my feet. Comfortable? Heavenly. At least I didn't get dragged out of my shoes like my partner in crime, Hunter Harris.
PBXVI [sotto voce]: If you had, perhaps you'd have replaced them with something less tacky.
